Joke: New Viruses · Ellen Degeneres virus -- Your IBM suddenly claims it's a MAC. · Monica Lewinsky virus -- Sucks all the memory out of your computer. · Titanic virus -- Makes your whole computer go down. · Disney virus -- Everything in the computer goes Goofy. · Mike Tyson virus -- Quits after one byte. · Prozac virus -- Screws up your RAM but your processor doesn't care. · Sharon Stone virus -- Makes a huge initial impact, then you forget it's there. · Lorena Bobbit virus -- Turns your hard disk into a 3.5inch floppy. · Tim Allen virus -- Appears helpful, only to destroy your hard drive upon contact. · Woody Allen virus -- Bypasses the motherboard and turns on a daughter card. · Saddam Hussein virus -- Won't let you into any of your programs. · Tonya Harding virus -- Turns your .BAT files into lethal weapons. · George Michaels virus -- Runs its course, occasionally releasing excess data buildup. · Joey Buttafuoco virus -- Only attacks minor files. · X-files virus -- All your Icons start shape shifting. · Spice Girl virus -- Has no real function, but makes a pretty desktop. · Ronald Reagan virus -- Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored. · Dr. Jack Kevorkian virus -- Searches your hard drive for old files and deletes them. · Sony Bono virus -- Just when you get surfing the web, a firewall appears out of no where. · Martha Stewart virus -- Takes all your files, sorts them by category and folds them into cute little doilies to be displayed on your desktop. · Oprah Winfrey virus -- Your 200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB, and then slowly expands to 300MB. · AT&T virus -- Every 3 minutes it tells you what great service you are getting. · MCI virus -- Every 3 minutes it reminds you that you're paying too much for the AT&T virus. · Arnold Schwarzenegger virus -- Terminates and stays resident. It'll be back.