Joke: Clinton

Q: Why was it difficult for Clinton to fire Monica Lewinsky?
A: He couldn't give her a pink slip without asking her to
try it on first.

Q: What do Monica Lewinsky and Bob Dole have in common?
A: They were both upset when Bill finished first.

Q: What is Bill's definition of safe sex?
A: When Hillary is out of town.

Q: What is the difference between Clinton and the Titanic?
A: Only 200 women went down on the Titanic.

Q: How does Bill keep Monica Lewinsky away from the White
House?
A: He keeps offering to send Ted Kennedy over to give her a
ride.

President Clinton looks up from his desk in the Oval Office
to see one of his aides nervously approach him. "What is
it?" exclaims the President. "It's this Abortion Bill Mr.
President, what do you want to do about it?" the aide
replies. "Just go ahead and pay it." responds the President.

Q. What does Bill say to Hillary after a romantic interlude?
A: "Honey, I'll be home in 20 minutes."

Q: Why does Bill Clinton cheat on Hillary?
A: He wants to be on top.

Q: How did Bill Clinton paralyze Hillary from the waist
down?
A: He married her.

Q: How does Bill Clinton teach a woman to golf?
A: He starts with the irons and ends up in the woods.

Q: When did Clinton realize Paula Jones wasn't a Democrat?
A: When she didn't swallow everything he presented.

"One thing's for sure about Clinton...
He sure doesn't neglect domestic affairs!"

Q: What's the difference between Bill Clinton and a gigolo?
A: A gigolo can only screw one person at a time.

Q: What's the definition of an Arkansas Virgin?
A: A girl that can run faster than the Governor.

Q: What does Teddy Kennedy have that Bill Clinton wishes
*he* did?
A: A dead girlfriend.

Q: Why did Bill go out to sea on an aircraft carrier?
A: To promote off-shore drilling.

Q: What game did Bill Clinton want Paula Jones to play?
A: Swallow the leader

Q: Why is Clinton so interested in events in the Middle
East?
A: He thinks the Gaza Strip is a topless bar.

Q: Why is Hillary suing Bill for divorce?
A: Because he's doing to everybody what he should only be
doing to her.